Sunday, January 04, 2015

Hit Man

I am an American hit man. Do you love baseball? Would you like to work for an underground group? Do you like killing morons in this country? 

I perform a comedy act on stage which centers around baseball. My growing popularity and the expansion of the Internet gives me carte blanche to remove certain undesirable elements in our country. Believe me, these mountebanks will not be missed.

Your role will be to get my act booked across America. For this, you need to love baseball, love America and have the desire to become part of being something bigger than yourself.

My baseball character goes back to 1888 and turns audiences into a miasma of laughter. I am a performer, but I need help extending my audience. If you see yourself in such a role, contact me directly. I hope to see you soon.

So, this was going to be the way it was. My life had changed. I had become part of a movement in America. To join the 1% I had to agree to sell my soul.

I thought for a moment.

What did I really have to lose?

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