Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Dick Deck

Dick Deck was still half asleep. He heard the vibrating of his Smart phone and his right arm reached out to grab the vibrating villain. His ex, Debbie was texting. He used one eye to read the screen. DO YOU STILL BUY LOTTERY TICKETS AT CHICKS AND CHUGS? Dick cursed loudly and threw the phone across the room. He returned to sleep and ignored the ensuing calls which quickly began to multiply. He didn’t lean until noon that the world was soon to be at his door. Dick Deck had just won a billion dollars! Dick never heard the vibrating which was muffled after he tossed it in the closet. He couldn’t ignore the banging on the door. When he managed the navigate the short walk from his one bedroom apartment to the door, he was almost trampled by the hoopla which met him. DICK DECK—YOU JUST WON A BILLION DOLLARS---WHAT ARE TOU GOING TO DO NEXT? Dick rubbed his eyes as they tried to ignore the now overhead sun. “What the Fuck?” At Lottery HQ, the place was buzzing as well. A press conference had been scheduled for early evening and the national press would be there. This would be the first time in history that a check for one billion dollars would be presented. The director, Manny Lotts, was trying to keep cool, but couldn’t stop pressuring his pretty assistant, Cherie. “Did you get Dick?” Cherie turned red. “I beg your pardon.” “Dick! Dick! Dick! What’s your problem? That’s they guy’s name. Ain’t it? And so it was. And Dick Deck was 6 hours away from claiming his new fortune. Jerry Mander had been to jail once and he never intended to go back. As head of the New York Families, he was responsible for the income of thousands of men. That is why he was so interested in the newspaper article he was reading. BILLIONAIRE ON TV TODAY! Just then, Chloe, his personal secretary came in to the suite with his lunch. “I want you at this press conference.” Chloe took the newspaper, pivoted on her 3 inch heels and walked elegantly out of the room. The die had been cast. Dick Deck couldn’t believe his luck. Debbie and I had divorced last Christmas and they had signed the final papers two weeks ago. One billion dollars! Are you kidding me? Dick knew he had to hire someone, but the hours flew buy and suddenly it was time to get into the limo and drive into the city for the presser. All kinds of gorgeous women threw themselves at Dick as he slid into the backseat. The limo driver helped him fight off the babes and before they drove from the curb, he offered his evaluation. “You are one lucky man!” He said. All Dick Deck could do was smile. He just couldn’t stop smiling. One billion dollars! Are you kidding me?

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